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Source: The Hitavada      Date: 15 Oct 2017 10:27:30











 Q: Recently, you might have heard about the lost girlfrom my town Amravati. She is a 12-13year girl who went missing. After police and family drama, the girl was traced in Nagpur after 4 days. Later, it was revealed that it was neither a case of kidnapping nor child-trafficking. The girl had left her house on her own will and the most shocking part, that after she was found, she again attempted to run away because she did not want to return back to her family. It is known from the girl’s family’s close sources that the environment of their house was quite strict and disciplined. They still don’t have a smartphone in their house! My question to you is, was that girl really at fault? People around me are talking a lot about that girl and how she is hot tempered and naughty, while her twin sister is very calm. Ma’am, even I was brought up in a very strict environment and my elder sibling with a high IQ was always preferred. Somewhere I feel, I relate to the girl’s feeling of not wanting to return back home! I’m disturbed with the way people are blaming the girl for themes ,even as I believe that the girl is not at fault... Ma’am, please help me understand where is the girl's fault, or the parents are wrong?

 Ans. This case needs to be looked into from many angles. One is that a girl of age 12 will not leave home until she has the support of someone to care for her. It is possible only when she is suffering from a mental disorder where she is not aware of the reality and runs away or strays away from home repeatedly. Such cases though rare have been reported in Nagpur too where a girl strayed away from school and got lost in another area. The issue of the family being dominating can be a reality because violence and abuse in families is a common phenomenon. Not having a smart phone at home is not an anomaly as most times it is not required at all and children should not be provided smart phones in school levels- it only makes them addicted and unsmart. The violence, if any, and the domination needs to stop immediately and the police authorities can take note and action against the family members/parents. They should be given a strict warning and let off with a threat.

Child-line (helpline for children) should be informed about such children and they can intervene in such families as social workers. They should follow up such cases for future care and monitor their progress of adjustment in the family. As far as the question of ‘whose fault’ is concerned, the ultimate moral and legal responsibility falls on the parents who will be ‘found guilty’ of bad management and bad parenting.

 S S

Q: I am a III semester student of BSc (Maths) group and I have a back in semester I and II in the PCM group. I just cannot concentrate on my studies, because I have no interest in PCM and was forced by my parents to pursue this. I have deep interest in Civil Engineering. Though its been two years since I am studying BSC, I still don’t like as is Evident by my poor performance in the exams and the backlogs that I cannot clear. Please advice whether Civil Engineering is good option for me or not!

Ans: Any option is a good option whether it is maths or engineering. The important and decisive factor is your aptitude and interest in the discipline. it would be a good idea to get your aptitude measured and guidance taken for the best options for you. The second chance that you take form a king afresh choice should be the right one and not a fancy of your mind or a pressure from your parents. This is the unfortunate reality that we see around us now-a-days.