Victims of coaching fads

Source: The Hitavada      Date: 30 Jul 2017 12:31:13


 

Q.I am a student of Pharmacy and I was in relationship with my classmate for one year. Last April, he broke up with me for another girl. Though he has drastic mood swings, he continues to be my best friend. Despite being in a relationship, he gets close to me but the very next day he gets abusive. In the past, he slapped me in public and has verbally abused me too. I know he isn't right for me, but I can’t stop loving him. Ans. Sometimes it is easy to go along with the situation for your mind may not be ready to lose him completely. Only when the mind rebels totally do you break off like a surgical cut. If you find some benefits in maintaining his friendship then keep him for some more time and if you feel stressed out being with him and feeling used and exploited then throw him out of your life. It is for you to estimate the benefits and losses in maintaining such a fellow in your life.

Try making new friends, moving around in a new circle of girls, joining a hobby class and getting involved with things you love doing. Knowing yourself helps you know what you want in terms of pleasure and happiness on a long term basis. Develop yourself and improve yourself. Focus on your own self and people who love you. Do not waste your time being a sucker and loser. A K Q. I am a student and just completed BSC (Biotect, Biochem & Zoology). I am confused what to do now. Please help me. Ans. This would require a longish discussion with you and your long term goals as well as your likes and dislikes and interest areas. You could pursue in your post graduation any one of the above mentioned subjects which lead to different types of fields of study.

All of them are good and interesting butwhatis important iswhat youwant to do and enjoy doing. A session of career guidance will be helpful. XYZ Q. I am a student of Class 12. I am facing problem in studying as I don’t get time to study. I go to school and after that I have tuitions till 8 pm. My grades are getting affected. Ans. Yes this is a genuine problem. Students seem to be running from school to coaching centres and finding no time for self studies. If you are taking coaching for entrance examinations then you may need it.

If you are not preparing for any entrance exams but is focusing only on Std 12 then you might drop out of the coaching totally. Many good students feel competent enough to appear for entrance by self study and do not want extra coaching besides regular school teaching. Take a call on your own competencies and make way for self study.

This is most important part of education. To be able to self study and use your own intelligence instead of getting over-tutored by first school and then repeating the whole agenda at coaching centres seems madness to me. It is just a fad created by vested agencies and the whole city of Nagpur seems to have fallen victim to this stupid fad. Be bold and take your own decision. XYZ Q.

Iwas in lovewith a boy.Wewanted toget marriedbut couldn’t due to our caste. I later got married to business person of my caste. But I am still in love with him and I miss him a lot. I feel I am cheating on my husband by this. Please help. Ans.

This unfortunate story will resolve one day when you settle in for a few more years with your husband and married life. Build a new circle of friends, get to know your husband better, spend more time with him and be devoted to him.You have taken marriage vows and that should mean something to you. Make hisfamily and friends your own and get busy with your new life.

Enrich it with hobbies and activities you like. Emotions can always be controlled and marriage is not always about love. It is about responsibility and duties and devotion. It is a commitment about building a stable and strong family. If you have different goals about marriage then that should have been thought of earlier. Give this a good try