BY NOW, no doubt is left behind about what kind of invasion is taking place of the mental space of our youngsters. Every kind of negativism is being fed into their impressionable minds -- resulting into some terribly shocking ideas germinating in their heads and taking roots and growing menacingly. Naturally, our youngsters are popping up ideas and behaviours that shock anybody out of wits. This is making it compulsory for the larger society to start devising ways and means to counter the dirty narrative that is being fed to youngsters. This can be done by taking youngsters into confidence, engaging them in meaningful, sensible conversation on a near-continuous basis, weaving them integrally into family environ, making them feel important on every possible issue, making them talk, speak up, share their opinions and observation (no matter then, if those are militating against the so-called family values). The task may seem difficult. In actuality, that may not be the case. The family elders may not overdo things by dragging the youngsters into family conversation and dialogue. What is needed to be done is to evolve a familial eco-system in which the young and old get an opportunity to express themselves, and share their thought -- without any inhibitions. Simple frank talk. Simple open conversation -- on any subject, from films and fights, culture to agriculture, career to aircraft carriers, family disputes to family values ... !

 

The families need not carve out hours for this task. Healthy conversations can be struck in the kitchen or in the bedroom or in the TV room, and the time could be absolutely any -- morning, evening, night. Such talks can take place driving in the car, or waiting in the queue for cinema tickets. But more the family elders get connected with their youngsters the better it will get. Such an atmosphere will foster an open dialogue, a clear sharing of thoughts and ideas and dreams and difficulties and challenges and questions and issues feelings and frustrations. Once a culture of open dialogue gets initiated, our youngsters -- our darling kids of different ages -- will get a natural shield of our love and care and careful consideration of subjects. That is all we have to achieve in our homes -- at least in our homes, if not in schools or colleges -- to begin with. Of course, as the loud-thinker has said it on countless occasions in this column as well, the best time is the dinner time -- when the family can get together and share experiences, good and bad, of life and also build a common idea or thought that would eventually get ingrained in the family’s cultural fabric. Here, there is an anecdote from the life of the great, sage-like patriot, poet, author and social thinker (the late) Sane Guruji. In his iconic Marathi book Shyam Chi Aai (Shyam’s Mother) written around 80 years ago, Sane Guruji narrates that anecdote: Shyam completes his bath near the well in the backyard, and calls his mother out.

 

Then he asks his mother to spread the open end of her saree -- Pallu or Padar (in Indian languages) -- so that he could dry his feet on the cloth and walk into the house. “I don’t want my wet feet to get sullied with dirt,” he says to his mother. The mother responds, “Shyam, I am happy you worry so much about keeping your feet clean. Worry similarly about keeping your mind clean, too.” What is called sanskaar is delivered so simply, through every-day, casual conversations. This happens in every family, one must agree. But in the current conditions, that family conversation needs to be fostered with care and caution -- so that we have a tab on our children before they fly out into the outer space of life. By that point in time, if the family conversation is on right lines, there are almost no chances of the kids going astray. However, the thrust of this current series is not exactly about sanskaar in a traditional style. It is about protecting the kids from undue influences of extremely sly nature. And keeping the children in close connect of the family elders is the only way to achieve that otherwise seemingly impossible task in times when extraneous pressures and influences are overbearing. (To be continued) (Readers’ response to the issue is welcome)